National Anti-Adoption Month: 30 answers to 30 questions.

The problem for adoptees arguing about their position in society is similar to what has been experienced previously by other marginalized groups looking to make a space within the hegemonic culture. Namely, how to expand out from what is considered simply a personal issue; an individual hang-up; a “selfish” focus on one’s condition. The individualistic and solipsistic dominant culture ironically turns around and tells its absconded-with children to not be so “selfish” as to complain. In other terms, this was used against other groups as well—”don’t be ‘uppity'”; “know your role”. We should literally be seen and not heard. Those days are over.

What follows is a reversal of roles. 30 answers to 30 questions that have come up in discussion boards and various “answer” web sites that pretend to be objective but more often than not stifle debate, delete contrarian posts, and disallow membership to those with a minority point of view—the web site Canada Adopts! is probably the most fascistic in this regard. This is understandable, however, when we consider that the answers to the questions, when removed from a personal or individual emotional plane, and instead focusing on the economic and political realm, are harder to justify by those in power—and thus the retaliation, the backlash, and the twisted framing of the dominant culture of those seeking infants as being somehow minority, victimized, and on the defensive.

Armed with this positioning of the argument, the anti-adoption movement is poised to join its brothers and sisters in other liberation movements of dispossessed and marginalized peoples the world over in the struggle for equality, true equality; the status of polis for all, and the end of the false positioning of the dominant mode of thinking as anything other than what it is: the political and economic destruction of those who don’t fit in to its view of the world. Nothing more and nothing less.

Read questions and answers:


About Daniel Drennan ElAwar

Adoptee, rematriated.
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2 Responses to National Anti-Adoption Month: 30 answers to 30 questions.

  1. Pingback: Quote of the Day: on anti-adoption, “bitterness” and the “non-compliant adoptee” | A (not so good) little Bee Mommy

  2. Daniel, I echo so much of what you have written. I was a teenager in love. Pregnant, I then was deemed an unmarried mum,I became a fugitive for my sins, falling in love with the wrong man, the wrong race, the the wrong culture the wrong religion, told it was infatuation not love,banished to another country. Incarcerated in a penal servitude regime they called an unmarried mother home, for one year,my baby was mixed race. I begged to keep him,was never told there was welfare funding,I never was told of my legal rights. ADOPTION an act of UNMITIGATED CRUELTY, took place. Deemed societies filth,sexually deviant, feebleminded, you WILL PAY, we will take your baby for adoption, placed with a MARRIED, MOTHER AND FATHER. My baby was nine months old when ripped from my arms, a bottomless abyss of sorrow ensues,a living bereavment becomes your every day life,anti-depressants become your friend to make it through another day, insomnia, well you learn to adapt to insomnia.SOCIETY must address the cultural denial of the suffering of mothers/fathers,our beloved son/and daughters,SEARED SO DEEPLY by adoption, grief separation and such loss. Reunion is the final dregs of the poisoned chalis of adoption,so damaged, your baby never recognises you as mum, yet the mum regresses back to the teenage mum, with a tsunami of mother-love that has been trapped for 40 years, overwhelmed by this need to love,care,nurture, your baby,that baby and you have a 100feet deep unpenetrable adoption wall that separates you,slowly you die inwardly, as the desires to be mum,the pinnings, longings, that never fade,they ebb and flow with every new day,the sombie takes over, there is no place to go, you take on the mantle of struggle daily to exist. They call adoption this “beautiful loving act”the swines, this is their language to fool the world,and service the rich and infertile. Adoption in my eyes, is the worst transaction in the history of the human race we need another Abraham Lincoln,to banish adoption as he did slavery, ADOPTION should be BANISHED TO THE ANNAL’S OF HISTORY.

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